30 for 30

As I get close to turning 30, I’ve been thinking a lot.I’m building this list of things. I’ve got a bit more time so some of these might change. These are in no particular order, but are numbered so I don’t have to count them.

  1. I would go to bat for anyone in my immediate family. And when I say go to bat, I mean I would fight to the death for any of them, especially my younger brother. I would sacrifice a lot for my friends too
  2. I’ve been very fortunate growing up and even into adulthood. I am very grateful for this
  3. I have had one year in my life where I’ve been incredibly disappointed in who I was. This has been very formative
  4. I don’t take a lot things seriously. I take family, love, and work seriously; I put everything I have into those. Also, the oxford comma is a very serious thing. Aside from that, pretty much everything is a luxury
  5. I got into triathlon because I got hurt emotionally (and thought I had failed), and the solution was to prove to myself I could do something big. My first ironman was the first thing I’ve done that I didn’t know I could
  6. I have weird superstitions
  7. Other than my nose, I have yet to break a bone (yes, I know… cartilage, etc)
  8. I have had some very weird, very amazing experiences through work
  9. I took far too long to get out of some bad situations. Getting out of them was the best thing I could do for myself. I chalk that up to being young
  10. I’m very moderated in my emotions, most of the time. It sucks because I have trouble expressing when I’m really excited for something
  11. I didn’t really start listening to music on my own until I was 16. Before that it was all music my parents listened to in the car. I still like classic rock and oldies, but my tastes in music are varied. I will karaoke anything, except for Hard To Handle as that’s reserved for me and Dan O’Brien
  12. I made a list of things I wanted to do in my life when I was in college. That list has changed significantly now, based on my changing priorities in life. But the main thing: to be a person that I can be proud of, that my parents can be proud of, that the people I love are proud of, remains the same
  13. A friend asked me the other day whether I was still driven by self-loathing (see 3 and 6). I’m not. A while ago, I came to grips with my anger towards pretty much everything. That’s not to say I’m not still driven by failures and disappointments, but I am driven by the desire to better myself for myself, to go out and do something epic and amazing. I don’t know if I can top the feeling of Ironman Arizona
  14. My list of races that I want to do isn’t selected because they are particularly famous, but because they are hard and beautiful and I might fail spectacularly. Chances are I won’t get to all of these:
  15. I once said that triathlon was the way I would end up traveling and seeing the world. The girl I was seeing at the time laughed in my face and said that was sad. I still think that racing around the world is awesome (whether it’s running or tris or whatever). I’m very fortunate to have the money to be able to do this
  16. I’ve found running to be the best therapy
  17. I have one rule for relationships
  18. People say you should have no regrets. There are things I wish i had done differently. There are a couple of things I regret, but they’ve made me a better person, I think. In general, I’ve tried to make the best decisions I could with the knowledge I had at the moment, however flawed or incomplete it might be
  19. I have trouble saying no to people. I hate to disappoint other people. This leads to me overextending myself and saying no to things I want and eventually disappointing others. I also tend to disappoint myself, but I always excuse that.
  20. I used to think cycling would be the sport for me. I love cycling but I love running much much much more
  21. I grew up a Yankees fan (dad had season tickets), and people assume I jumped on the bandwagon after we moved to Florida. That’s not the case
  22. I’d really like to go to all 7 continents at some point. Wait, there are 7 continents, right?
  23. I don’t like situations where I think I might know the outcome and it’s probably not good. On TV, shows like the Larry David Show take it just across that line to the point where I feel uncomfortable. Modern Family and Arrested Development don’t. Figure that one out
  24. Working for my first boss was like having an older brother. Helped that the job was 7 days a week, 10 hours a day (or more). If I’m ever the boss of anyone, I hope I can replicate the way he led and related
  25. I am an anglophile for no apparent reason
  26. The only person I can rely on to make myself happy is me. My family and friends can make me happier, but to be happy, that’s on me (thanks, Kerry)
  27. I would love to go on a long distance adventure like the AT or Pacific Crest Trail
  28. I am getting better at most things with age
  29. I find the human body and “spirit” incredibly amazing. I’ve been very fortunate to never get seriously hurt (see above) despite having been hit by a car, crashed a bike at good speed, skied a bunch of stuff above my skill level, been punched square in the jaw (I deserved it, probably), etc. Then I see friends and people I’ve never met who have been oft injured or worse going out and persevering through what they have to do and saying fuck you to all of it and just rocking it. Liked I said, I’m amazed . I just wish we had tails
  30. For a while in my early 20s, I didn’t think I would make it to 30. I think this was one of those youthful things where I was thinking that 30 seemed so far away and I was sure I was going to die before then and I was just immature. But I’m glad I’ve made it. So much learned, so much left to learn and experience (love and heartbreak and happiness and sadness and pain and exultation and doing amazing things and doing normal things)